The Power of the F#%k It

I was in Chicago this weekend, and I was having breakfast with my former student and friend Kate Johnson. We were discussing a lot of our plans for visions of our future careers and ways we wanted to really make a difference with what we do.  I was telling her the premise of our upcoming The Body of Artists Leadership Program and how it differed from other programs. The subject came up of what actually stops people from reaching their goals, from having the ultimate success that they envision for themselves. We both agreed that on the surface it is people's internal dialogue about money, about time, about their self worth. We talked about how each person has experienced the world differently and it's been a series of events that have occurred in their lives that give them evidence of how "life is". Based on these experiences and evidence people form their behaviors around trust, responsibility, integrity, communication, self worth, abundance, and connection. People are not born dishonest, lacking confidence, thinking they'll never make enough money, or not trusting people. These are learned behaviors.  The only way to truly breakthrough these seeming limitations is to first practice changing your mind about it, then take actionable steps towards proving the opposite of the original belief, creating new evidence.

Easier said than done, right? How do you go sky diving when you are petrified of heights? How do you get up on a stage to make a presentation when the thought of speaking publicly makes you want to puke? How do you go for an interview at your dream job when you do not think you have what it takes to do the job let alone land it? How do you meet the right person and get married when you have had your heart smashed? 

Well the method is easy. It fact anyone who has ever been inhibited from their dreams and goals by their fears and reached them anyway, has used this method. It's really no secret. The method is beholding this very simple concept. If there is a thing you want more than anything, yet you can't seem to get past your own shit to get it...then you need to say to yourself "OH WHAT THE FUCK, DO WHATEVER IT TAKES!" Or in short, get a good healthy case of the Fuck-its.

Now I know this in itself sounds reckless to some.  Coming from a promoter type personality, this is the jam to my toast. But there are things I too have been trepidatious about because of past beliefs and if it weren't for me going against my screaming psyche's advice and exercise a healthy FUCK IT, I wouldn't be here blogging to you right now.

What exactly is a "healthy FUCK-IT"? Well in my experience, when one has a seeming obstacle, a road block between them and their goal, and all the safe ways of circumventing this obstacle have failed, it's going to take a level of courage to be and do something out of your box...something outrageous, to jump this hurdle. This thing may be risky, but as long as you know all the risks involved, and are prepared to deal with whatever comes, and you go for it anyway...that is a "healthy fuck-it". For example, when I was going to leave my part time job to start my freelance career and company in 2003/04, I knew my finances would be challenged. I knew I was going to lose my stream of revenue that I could automatically count on. But if I didn't take this risk, I couldn't reach my goal of becoming my own boss and creating the company that is now The Body of Art. So to be responsible, I did save a little, and started talking to many others who did freelance about what to expect...and then I plugged my nose, walked the plank, and jumped ship into seemingly shark infested waters. I had to say to myself "Oh what the fuck, do whatever it takes". Another even funnier story: a friend/colleague of mine (who shall remain nameless) really wanted to not only make it in the industry, but make it big. She idolized Crystal Wright, and followed all her work, her talks, and scoped out her programs  She didn't just want to be educated by her, but she wanted to learn from her personally, and create a relationship with her. So she sent her emails, called her...but to no avail, she could not get a response that would open a door for them to personally connect. Now I do not recommend this to everyone, because it definitely could backfire, but the brazenness in my friends fuck-it moment blew my mind.  She decided one day she would show up on Crystal's doorstep, and personally introduce herself. So she found out where she lived, and at a reasonable time of the day...showed up to her house. Now responsibly she prepared an intro that would hopefully disarm Crystal of thinking she was totally nuts and a crazy stalker. Apparently Crystal was at home that day and did open the door.  I do not remember exactly how it went, but today they are close friends, and my friend is a huge support and advocate of the PYP program, not to mention an amazing visionary, entrepreneur, and makeup artist.

So on the other hand, you may be wondering what an "unhealthy fuck-it" is. Simply, it is being reckless in your decision making and actions, which in short means you do not educate and prepare yourself for what might happen should the risk you take go awry. If you are not responsible about your risk, and you incessantly get yourself into scenarios where you throw yourself into the sea with no protection, you will probably over time lose a limb or two, and you have no one to blame but yourself. The difference may in fact be caring about the result, and not caring. Caring does not mean being overly cautious, just like not caring means being brave. If you educate yourself on what to expect into the ocean of your risk, you can go into it with the knowledge of what's out there, maybe in a cage, maybe with a knife, a bite proof suit...The reward is you can discover some really beautiful things. You don't become Jacques Cousteau by looking at the sea from the edge of a boat. You say "fuck-it" and take the plunge with the intention of going farther than any other man has gone before.

They say courage is not being without fear - It's having fear and doing it anyway. That is the beautiful moment of a "fuck-it". The ultimate human experience. Freeing yourself from worry with the intention of reaching your potential. So what have you been holding back on because there is a seeming obstacle between you and the very thing that will elevate you? And what is a healthy, actionable "fuck-it" you can embark on to have that liberating breakthrough? Come on in...the water is amazing! Just please make sure you learn to swim first...or at least wear your swimmies.

Talk - Action = Bad Gas

I have to give props to this excellent blog article that caught my eye with its fabulous title the other day: Talk - Action = Shit by Bradley Richardson (http://www.bradleyrichardson.com/blog/thoughtleaders) As we are coming up with our new leadership program in July, where being your word is the quintessential cornerstone to running a great business...it reminded me how on both a personal and business level people use the the Internet as a veil to talk a big game, but when it comes down to the action of their words its just a cloud of 'gas'.

On a business level, there are thousands and thousands of online businesses popping up everyday.  I look at their cookie cutter formats and promises, and self proclaimed accolades and quite honestly it gives me an eye-rolling headache. As an educator who has been teaching since I was 17 years old, it really makes me sad when one day someone out of nowhere claims to be "the best deal, for the most value" or have "everything you need to learn to get started as an industry professional", or "top celebrity makeup artist teaches you all their secrets"... I'm sorry, but where is the list that these people "top" artists are at the top of? And what part of the industry are you providing "everything" someone needs to get started?

Ok, so now let me push the pause button on the rant fest. Verbal vomit is great for authentic expression and momentary awareness but it really does nothing if you don't apply it introspectively. Being your word and turning talk into action is one of the most glorious experiences a human being can have. And let's be honest, the experience is probably even more amazing because in the secret hidey-holes of our souls, we all - including myself - have at some point bullshitted ourselves expertly. I have made claims on what I stand for and what I will never do, and have had my own fall-off-the-wagon moments. It's humanity. And truthfully, unless you are a monk/nun/recluse and can rid yourself of all the distractions of life, there are moments where you'll have the "fuck its", throwing your ideals to the wind. I do it personally (more often) and in my business (rarely). There have been occasions we'll cut a corners as long as it seemingly affects no one..But in the end it always affects someone. 

Someone somewhere is always being affected by cutting a corner, falling behind in their word, falling short. Usually the person is ourselves.

The beautiful thing about this is at any given moment, we can restore this integrity. In fact I have had more respect for a business owner that has fucked up, and with amazing customer service has fixed the situation and acknowledged its affect on me, rather than one that just sweeps it under the rug. You need the action to match your claims, otherwise no one will trust you... As a friend or a business.

If you are going to tell you're friend you will come to their birthday party, work function, private social engagement (fill in the blank)... and you keep dropping out, even if it is "not your fault", or "out of your control" ... It is still your responsibility to acknowledge the impact it has on your friend and make good on your word. If you are going to make claims in your business that you have the best education out there and are creating the most value for your students, then you had better be prepared to receive feedback on all ends to make sure you match that claim. It's a huge responsibility and if you want to hold that claim, you need to cross every "T", and dot every "I", double and triple check yourself. If there is something that will come across to your audience as bullshit or "hot air", then own it and fix it. We need not to strive for perfection, just excellence. Best not to claim to be the best, let others claim it on your behalf because you were too busy being it to talk about it.

What is Leadership?

If there is a question I ask myself every single day, sometimes unintentionally, it is 'what is leadership'? I may not even ask it in those precise words. I may not even ask it in the context of a group of people. But in order to take on the things I do, and the things I want to accomplish, every day this question must be posed.

Leadership is often a term people give prestigious status. It is often looked at as something only people with certain gifts can obtain. But in reality, it's something we can choose to take on at any moment. In the moment we are presented with a situation, we can choose to handle it from a context of Leadership, or not. This choice is neither right or wrong, good or bad. It simply is a choice that delineates a result with a lasting impact, for a larger vision, and likely benefit more than oneself.

I am sitting on the train this morning daydreaming of my upcoming day and what I need to get done. At a stop, a group of people walk on and I am still in Lala-Land. I notice the person next to me gets up and I see he is offering his seat to a middle aged woman. Not old per say, but older than he and I for sure. I looked to see the pleasantly surprised look of gratitude on her face as she sat next to me. He gave the woman a brief smile and held on to the bar. It was nothing to him, almost an automatic decision to give up his seat. He also did not get off soon; he was on the train for many more stops, standing. There was nothing especially unique looking about this guy. He was just a guy, but in that moment he was a leader. Why? Because he inspired me. He made me step outside my box and consider things next time I have the opportunity to bring a pleasant surprise of joy to someone else, someone I don't know, for no reason at all except to be able to. And I'm sure I'm not the only one he inspired in that moment. His act may have also opened up something for that woman, who knows.

In dealing with my clients, I have come across a plethora of situations where I not only have to ask myself what a good business owner do, but also what a leader would do. In many of these situations, a decision that may be wise for my business may not necessarily be the one a leader would make. In the end I always have to ask myself... What is the situation with a win/win? Does it mean I may need to take responsibility for something that makes me uncomfortable but in the end will have everyone benefit? Or will it be better for my business if I just choose the easier decision, and walk away knowing only one of us has won? Will I always wonder if I could have handled things better.

Leadership as whole, when integrated into my home, work, and life may take more effort and focus but has proven time and time again to manifest stronger relationships, stability, abundance...and it empowers me. It also has been known to inspire others around me to not only trust me but step up and take on a leadership context in their own lives. It sounds like a responsibility that no one would want to take on, but the point I am making is you already do, like it or not. That man probably didn't wake up and say to himself, 'I'm going to be a leader today', but by giving up his seat he was one, without even knowing it. If he did not, would it have been bad? No, of course not. People's lives would have gone on just the same as they always have. Trust me, choosing the leadership context is not something I do all the time - I'm a human being. There are days when I don't feel like it, and the world around me doesn't change. But the more I choose it, the easier it becomes, the more rich my life is, and the more I attract the people who are also leaders living in integrity.

This became such a stand, such an intoxicating way to live, that I came up with this idea...a crazy plan to take my talents, my gifts, and use them to share this idea of leadership. It's my way of improving the planet. Because as long as anyone can be empowered by a choice, a choice that may inspire greatness and potential in others, why not spread it?

Our industry was in need of support and guidance when it comes to building a business from a place of Leadership. Thus for the past 4 years I have built the The Body of Artists Leadership Program, a creative community of artists committed to growing and giving through Leadership. We are about to start our 4th program in July. I'm so proud of the artists that have come through it already... Making the world a better place with their art and integrity. I could not as a teacher and mentor, and quite honestly as a human being, ask for more.

How do you know you are on the right Path: World Malaria Day Project Conclusion

I'm sitting here with fingers paused above the keys because there is just so much to tell you, so much to share, I almost don't even know where to begin...

So let's start with a review. The past few months I have been sharing my thoughts on how you know you are on the " right path". Concurrently I have been describing my journeys in Africa working on this World Malaria Day project as an example of events that give me signs that I am in fact exactly where I'm supposed to be. In review, the key essential points I have touched on are as follows:

1. Set clear visionary intentions or prayers as to what you want to create as though it's already on its way to you.

2. When things fall apart, know that it is sometimes a bigger plan at work to bring you closer to where you are supposed to be, even if you do not know what it is in the moment.

3. Every vision and road to being on your right path has a lot of hard, committed, challenging, work to get it to be where it is considered off the ground and a success.

4. When you combine faith with committed action, everything around you conspires and aligns to open doors and free channels towards your desired result.

These all have shown up at different times and several levels of extremes throughout the journey. Especially the one that talks about when things fall apart...ha, we could write a movie script solely based on that one. There are only two more vital key points to check in with. And I'm not sure I even truly got them all until this last trip.

Upon our arrival in Nigeria for the 3rd time I soon learned our schedule for our art pieces needs to be drastically altered...this was based on a series of miscommunications, and not doing our triple check list as thoroughly as we thought. I could say it was how things work in Nigeria, but after being in Nigeria for a total of 4 weeks prior, we really cannot use that excuse. But truth be told, it was divine intervention because the way the schedule ended up was actually better than what we had planned. (No surprise).

As a result we were scrambling, as we had to find new venues for our pieces, build a model roster with a limited budget, work out a ton of logistics and get enough sleep to function. When things get down to the wire, people's tensions are high, exhaustion starts to take its toll, and emotions are raw. This last week was by far the most challenging leg of the project. Breaking down and crying at some point was inevitable. Signs you are up to something big.

But when things get this intense, and it seems like all your plans are on shaky ground, you know you are on the right path when two things happen: the very people who will be the ultimate support to getting you through to the finish line are either already around you or will show up exactly when you need them...you just need to ask.

There was a point where we were struggling to find models for our installations and fashion show. We had met some really amazing models who had been apart of our journey already from the beginning, but these were seasoned professional models who often get paid a decent agency rate. With as many hiccups as we have had, our budget was not what we would have liked it to be. We had been blessed to have had many vendors offer us discounts and donations, but we were still very limited. So I was given the task of procurring models, good ones, with only a small stipend for incidentals. I know more than anyone that in our industry models are always being mistreated and taken advantage of especially when it comes to rate. So not only did I need to handle this delicately but also was challenged to figure this out in another country. I did at one point start to panic when on Wednesday we only had 2 people confirmed when in fact we needed 12-20. So I took a deep breath, reminded myself this is all going to happen, I just needed to see with different eyes and approach with a a faithful open heart. So I first picked up the phone and called my friend Lola Maja...One of the best makeup artists in Nigeria who had come over prior to help me with production. I told her I needed both makeup artists and models and was stuck with knowing where to get them. She immediately assured me she would work on it and not to worry. Then I picked up the phone and called every model I had met up to date to connect with each about the project, and humbly request they be involved despite our lack of funds. I realized the only way this would work is if I had already created the relationship with them where they would trust who I was and what I stood for. Slowly I got in touch with at least 5 models and each one not only agreed to be 100% in but moved schedules in order to be there. By Thursday were still short quite a few and I still had not heard back from Lola. In fact I now couldn't get a hold of her at all. Simultaneously we had just found out our location for one of our biggest pieces decided to pull out because someone else offered them more money for the same time slot. So while Robin was spending three hours of our very limited and valuable prep and planning time fighting to get our slot back, I was at the apartment with Caitlin one day before our show having a major "oh shit" moment.

Just when I was literally about to pull my hair out, I said aloud to Caitlin "How the f@*%# are we going to do this without models?" Not a second later my phone rang. It was a Nigerian number, not programmed into my phone. When I answered, a woman named Bola introduced herself. She said she had bumped into a friend named Lola Maja that day and she had mentioned to her about our project, which Bola had actually heard of.  Bola happened to own a small modeling agency and she would be more than honored to supply us with models. I stared at the phone in pure awe, and started to laugh. After thanking her profusely I asked her to send specs of the people she had available to my email address. I hung up the phone and looked at Caitlin, and said "Wow."

I called Robin immediately to tell him, not just because we pretty much had our model situation handled, but to share that experience of "ask and you shall receive". Robin seemed not to be surprised, and just concurred that we were meant to do this show and everything would work out. Oh and by the way, through his own version of coercion, managed to get our space back. Biggest sigh of relief up to date.

To say everything went smoothly after that would be a nice fairy tale ending, although not true to life in the slightest. But here is the catch: Through every thing that didn't go as planned and then turned out anyway, through every disagreement we had that came to a compromise, through every epic fail that turned into an ingenious divinely designed occurrence...it all brought the biggest blessing and piece of evidence that I was exactly where I was supposed to be. I knew without a shadow of a doubt because I felt so alive. That surge of energy I spoke of in the beginning of these accounts never went away. It ebbed and flowed continuously throughout this journey and stays with me and propels me even after it's over. If you do not feel utterly alive in all that you choose to do, then it's time to make different choices. Further, the energy of life comes from the movement of ups and downs, not predictable flatlines. If you take anything away from this know that life is an intricately designed wave of fabric that brings a perfectly intertwined mix of surprises and soulful knowing. Our wisdom comes from learning to ride this wave with as few attachments to how it's "supposed to be".

I know you have been waiting patiently to learn about these projects, so I'll end this blog with some amazing behind the scene pictures and subtle description of what we accomplished. Hope you enjoy it and will be walking away with assurance that your right path is the one you are standing on. You get to look for the signs as to which direction to take that will lead you to your purpose and bliss.

Piece 1: 1000 kids

In order to illustrate the horrific statistic that Nigeria loses 1000 kids a day to malaria, we decided to take on the challenge of photographing 1000 kids together in one shot. Seen here are some behind the scenes images of us capturing this beautiful image in Bathagary. This was the 2nd of two attempts to get this shot. Our intention was to raise this image on a gigantic banner on the side of the road by the 3rd Mainland bridge where over a million people a day pass by in traffic.

Shot taken by the amazing Reze Bonna, and copy edited by Mike Gibbs.

©Reze Bonna

(The little girl in the middle is my favorite.)

Piece 2: Malaria Moves

To illustrate the fact that Malaria is everywhere, we created a moving installation by body painting what are called skater boys with our 1000 kids statistic, while having some wear a sweat stained skull face, and others in our famous Moskeeto Mask. These boys skated through traffic throwing fliers in the windows of cars. The fliers brought awareness of the statistic that the mosquito carrying the malaria virus bites as early as 4:30pm. We also painted on another actor a rendition of death, who walked around with two ambiguous mosquito characters in everyday African scenarios. We ended up at the third mainland bridge where we watched our banner get raised while we spent time with the locals speaking about the project.

Piece 3: Mother Africa loses her Children

Inspired by Michelangelo's haunting Pieta statue, we wanted to recreated a body painted marble rendition of Mother Africa weeping over the loss of her child taken from her by the Malaria disease. Onlooking and observing were 9 female Mosquitos (females carry the virus) and two male. These masks were conceptualized by myself, but sculpted, molded, and cast by my amazing partner Suzanne Winwood and her awesome team, while they were painted by my self in Africa with local artists including Lola Maja, and Cass Koncept. The skater boys lured passing foot and car traffic outside into our Silverbird location by handing out flyers that said "Every 45 seconds, a mother buries her child". Eventually the skater boys became part of our installation as well.

Piece 4: Moskeeto Armor save Lives

The eve of World Malaria Day we had a fashion show primarily for press to show the wearability and versatility of the Moskeeto Armor, conceptualized and constructed by world renown designer Mai Atafo.  He spoke of how malaria affected his baby daughter and how it was not a question of if he wanted to be involved in our project, but a only a question in what capacity...

How do you know you are on the right path? (Africa Part 2)

This article is a continuation of Africa Part 1...

I'm just arriving back home in the states from the second out of three planned trips to Africa, where I'm co-creating this massive project to make a difference with malaria. Perfect timing, because I'm so excited to continue sharing more of my journey with you and how it relates to knowing when you are on the right path. If you missed the first part, travel back a post to catch up!

In part 1, I left off when Robin and I had our first fashion show together on World Malaria Day 2013. It was a great way to kick off our co-creativity together, and our first experience of doing something big outside of fashion week. We left a promise that perhaps the next big thing we do together would be in Africa. But the months and years that would follow would be tough for both of us. As with every passion business, especially ones that look to create a huge impact, there is a lot of work behind the scenes. Now I want to be clear, and not have that last part come out candidly...The road to every vision will require hard, committed, challenging, work to reach the point of success. This is the kind of work that should call into question if this vision of yours is what you are really supposed to be doing. I've seen dozens of people get excited about being a designer, a makeup artist, an actor, a painter, a musician... hell, even a salesman, a marketing exec, a teacher, a politician! They love the passionate part of the journey, but when it comes to the business grind - breaking through obstacles, maintaining a positive attitude despite the inevitable flops - a lot of people fold under the pressure. Running a business and being committed to something big, seeing it through to its fruition, can bring up many doubts about one's capability...and it can sometimes feel very lonely.

After our 2013, Robin and I had a lot of work to do in securing our visions with our businesses. I for one committed to take BoA to its next level, elevating its team members and its artistry, marketing and branding and developing and expanding its education and mentorship. This meant investing in education for myself, rebranding, hiring staff, taking risks on new classes and programs that were being tested out for the first time. It also meant cultivating relationships both new and old to reintroduce the brand and keep it relevant. Juggling all of this not only takes its toll on you physically, but artistically, mentally, and emotionally. It has you face feedback and failures head on...the type that had me break down in tears at times. It also had me need to really be conscious of my family and friend relationships so they were not neglected. I can only describe it as always being "on" my game all the time...pushing myself up when I fell down, getting support when I didn't want to bother anyone, and staying connected to the bigger vision to remember why I'm doing this, not just what I'm going to get out of it. It's not just doing amazing makeup everyday and getting paid lots of money...in fact I'm not sure that day will ever come, lol! But the passion and the pure satisfaction of what I do would not be as sweet if it were not for these challenging times. I may not be doing my art everyday (in fact, I had to force myself to write and paint despite my lack of time just to maintain my sanity) but I am working towards something big that will make a larger difference for someone else.

During this same time, Robin was going through his own challenges necessary for Moskeeto Armor to be released in Africa as a viable product. Now I do not want to discredit my own experience but most times when I thought my personal journey was rough, I would look Robin's and say to myself "Girl, shit's not THAT bad". Because Moskeeto Armor is a technology rather than just a fabric, and because essence of the brand was about how it literally saves lives, it had to go through thorough medical testing. So for three months Robin had to be in country overseeing and pushing medical trials. The areas in which Robin had to do this were the very jungle type raw villages of Bathagory and Épée. In these places there is no electricity, no hot water...it's like camping on crack, taking baths with a bucket in a grassy field, cooking over fire, dealing with all the elements. To top it off, when your body is not used to living in those conditions, it freaks out...I'll let you use your imagination for that one. It was dedicated, hard, non-creative work every single day. But absolutely necessary! Plus, imagine being in the heart of malaria's severity, being faced head on with the very thing you are trying to battle. Even in the most urban areas, Nigeria is a third world country. The main purpose of my first trip to Africa was to get acclimated to this; even in the finest of hotels electricity was unreliable, and cellular networks are shoddy. Remember our gas shortage during post hurricane Sandy? Try having that happen at least 2-5 times a month. Traffic there makes LA and New York seem like ride around the block. And most people drive with no rules! It takes a state of zen surrender to deal with it...which is why most people just hire drivers. Imagine dealing with all of this when you need to run to the trademark office to fill out one form...hoping its the right form...it could take you all day for a single errand. All the while, leaving a loving fiancé and 4 amazing children at home all anxious to see him.

I really just wanted to illustrate how intense it can get when you are pushing for a dream. But after all is said and done...I have a growing and reputable brand that people seek out and want to learn from. Robin has successfully proven Moskeeto Armor reduces infections from 95% to 5%. Do you think it was worth it? This was the only way to pave the way for what was to happen next.

Fast forward to the beginning of this year, Robin texts me: "Block out the last week of April for Africa".

I stared at the text wondering if I was reading it right, because we have all been saying for years that I would go one day, but it always felt like a distant fantasy. But since I know Robin doesn't joke like that, I simply responded "Ok. What are we doing?". He began to tell me of his idea to create a series of pop up "Banksy style" performance art installations that would raise awareness and "change the conversation" around Malaria using makeup and body art, essentially illustrating the necessity for Moskeeto Armor. I said "Awesome. Let's meet to discuss".

Our next meeting began what I would call the birth of creative miracles. This is where ideas were born and faith differentiates a dream from a plan. The ideas we came up with in that meeting could be described as precocious, far fetched, ambitious, or just down right crazy to the average ear. But it was passion and faith that made them not only doable, but game changing. We really saw them happening. I can't really tell you the details quite yet, as the element of surprise is the power of the project, but I'll be blogging the week it actually goes down to fill you in. I will tell you that the things that happened so far on this journey have been the clearest evidence to date that Robin and I were supposed to do this. When you combine faith with committed action, everything around you conspires and aligns to open doors and free channels towards your desired result.

For example, the worst possible time for me to go away was in April. I had pending trips to Hong Kong and Paris to teach at the Make Up For Ever Academies, and of course they all wanted to book around the same time. But the Paris academy suddenly postponed, and the Hong Kong academy pushed my trip to May...giving me time in both March and April to go to Africa for prep and production. My first trip was a series of meetings to discuss our project with designers, photographers, politicians, architects, and anyone who could possibly help us achieve our vision. When I tell you every meeting ended with an " I love your idea, I want to help you take it further", I even astonish myself in how receptive and positive everyone has been. We have Reze Bonna, one of the top fashion photographers in Africa, Mai Atafo, one of the highest acclaimed fashion designers, Kunle Adeyemi, an accomplished architect, and our friend Nze Akachukwu Nwankpo, also known as A.K.

Our meeting with A.K. was the one of the coolest I think we've had. A.K. is the special advisor on technical matters to President Goodluck Jonathan. He also runs the Citizens Club which is an initiative for Nigerians to pursue empowering goals that promote the happiness and wealth of Nigerians. "Happiness is Local!" is their philosophy. We originally flew to Abuja (the capital) to meet with AK to talk to him about gaining his support with his in connecting us to the big news syndicates in Nigeria and spread the word about our project. But when he heard our ideas, and connected with our vision, he wanted contribute and make it bigger. He offered to fund a larger part of our project where the representatives of the Citizens Club across Nigerian states would get involved and bring our message to a wider audience. This would also include a personal meeting with the president! Robin and I couldn't believe the success of this meeting...but clearly this is what happens when you are on the right path. There are a number of other incidents where this level of receptivity boosted us to another level.

This is where a surge of energy comes in and fuels us for what's to come...

Hope you'll join us in 2 weeks when our project premieres. Get the inside scoop on how we artistically turn heads and create a platform for awareness around malaria

How do you know you're on the right path? (Africa Pt.1)

Often times I hear people question their current path. Is this what I was meant to do? Am I fulfilling myself, or the purpose I was truly meant for? We've all had these thoughts. Sometimes we think we're an enigma, alone in thinking these things. As human beings we are constantly looking to fill a void, or be defined so we feel useful. Even if we have chosen a path, excel in it, and everyone else sees us as expert...we still question ourselves. 

So how the hell do you know for sure who you are supposed to be, or what you are meant to do? Yes I know...pretty deep for a makeup industry blog article...But it directly correlates with the experiences I'm currently having as an artist. You'd be surprised how relevant it can be to you, and how important it is for you to consider.

As you may or may not know, I have been in the process of co-creating an amazing project in Africa. In fact I am writing this article from Lagos, Nigeria. The experience of working on this project has been by far one of the most inspiring, exciting, and fulfilling things I have been part of up to date. I have never been so sure in my life that I am doing exactly what I was meant to do. The feeling I'm experiencing is an unparalleled surge of energy and love. It's as though a door has opened and a rush of pure purposeful electricity is being channeled through me so I can not only carry out my role in this project, but I have all that I need to see it through with excellence. I know, sounds crazy right?! I'm not trying to figure out why it's happening to me or why now (not really relevant in my opinion)...however I have been examining the ingredients of what it took to get here, so I might share this wealth in someway with you.

The project itself  (without giving away too much detail, because the end result is kind of a surprise), is literally working to make a difference in the world. I have been working with my buddy and partner Robin R. Crespo for about 3 years now. He's the owner and head designer of INGactivewear, an organization that produces The Code Purple Event and Moskeeto Armor. Moskeeto Armor is a patented fabric that is treated with a non toxic, undetectable insect repellent. Most commonly the fabric has been manufactured as a lightweight, ventilated, fashionable purple hoodie. This hoodie has been given to hundreds of villagers in the bush country of Uganda and Nigeria. It has gone through clinical trials and has been proven to increase the prevention of Malaria by 75%. If the mosquito cannot bite you, the deadly disease that kills 1000 children a day, (one child every 45 seconds), cannot infect you. Essentially Robin has figured out how to use fashion, to literally save lives. Pretty amazing right? SO, how do I fit into all of this?

Robin is an artist, just like myself. He doesn't just design clothes, or manufacture a solution to a problem with his craft.  He thinks on a creative level of how to communicate with art that will turn heads and get peoples attention. This is also how I view makeup; It is beyond beauty, beyond trend...It's an art medium I can use to inspire others, start conversations, and evoke thought.

Robin knew there was another artistic element needed to fully encapsulate his ideas, and that he couldn't do it alone. So, he set his intention to find a solution. Simultaneously, in building my brand, I have always known that who I am and what I do must not only make a difference in the world but inspire others to do so as well. As a result, I have expanded from just doing artistry into mentoring and educating artists to bring their own good into the world as well. However, as rewarding as it is to see people stepping into their potential and living their dreams in our industry (and it truly is what gets me out of bed), there has always been something I wanted to do that contributed to making a global impact. But I really was not sure what or how. So I too put my intention out there. As the serendipitous universe will always do it's work, Robin and I met through a mutual friend the summer of 2012. Though we were not sure exactly what our meeting and friendship would lead to, we knew from the first moment something had begun as a direct result of the intentions we put out.

I tell you this because one of the essentials to finding your purpose and where you're "supposed to be" is setting and putting out intentions. Some people call it prayer, some meditation, and some visualization. No matter what you believe it all comes from the same place: an intention in your heart made clear in your mind and vocalized from your mouth will start the journey of your desire to come your way. If you can't even speak it, or believe you are worthy of it, IT will not know where to find you. True intention does not come from just asking. A lot of conventional prayer is built around the idea of asking (sometimes begging) for what you want from a higher power. But true intention is knowing you have it, that it is already coming to you. The act of these prayers is just speaking it aloud so you can better believe it and others can conspire to bring it closer to you. I really didn't ask anyone if I could have an opportunity that would contribute to making a difference in the world. I knew it would happen. I just aligned with a truth. I even said aloud in meditation "The opportunity where my passion and art will make a life changing difference is on its way to me right now. Thank you for this opportunity"

After we met, Robin and I started planning a fashion show. This show would not only showcase the versatility of Moskeeto Armor but be the first time we would work together to convey an artistic concept. We started planning for a show during SS 2013 Fashion Week, but ran into some interesting challenges. First, the venue we were slated to use would not allow us to do what we wanted to do. Plus, we would be showing with other designers, but our concept was unique and powerful that we felt it wouldn't be appropriate to lumped our work in with others, fearing it would lessen our impact. Ultimately we made the tough executive decision to not show at September Fashion Week. Having a designer miss fashion week is not recommended because of the whole "top of mind" aspect...but we felt strongly that waiting would be best for the integrity of the project. Then, Robin threw his back out in January, putting a wrench in the subsequent plan to show at February Fashion Week. At this point one (and when I say one, I mean me) would start to wonder "Is this going to happen, is this meant to be?" But it was. A plan had been put in place, one that even I and Robin couldn't see in the beginning. This plan was bigger than us, bigger than what we thought it should be. It was created by our intentions and the divine web of energy that designs the biggest possibility for those intentions. Call it what you want - God, the Universe, Divine Intervention - Our show didn't belong in Fashion Week. It belonged in its own time on April 25th, World Malaria Day.

We would not have come to that conclusion if other things did not fall apart. So my second essential key to finding your purpose is to know that when things fall apart, it is sometimes a bigger plan at work. John Lennon once said "Life is what happens while you are making other plans". Often times we question if we are on the right path because nothing seems to go right in it's pursuit. You may be so clear that your goal or passion has to look a certain way, and when things do not go the way you "planned" get frustrated, discouraged, question things or even give up. The story wouldn't be interesting if shit didn't go down and get tough...in fact if everything always worked out as planned, the movie of your life would be a snooze fest. The bigger possibilities lie just outside the realm of what we can see immediately. If we don't see with the bigger eyes of our heart, we could miss it. In the moments where you get antsy and want to bolt, Buddha says hold your seat. A bigger plan for what you are meant to do may be revealed in the right time...when you are ready to hear it, see it, and take it on.

So we had our first fashion show. It was a collaboration of art, fashion, and makeup to showcase the versatility of Moskeeto Armor fabric and bring awareness of the impact Malaria has in Africa. We also committed to World Malaria Day being the ongoing date for our future projects together. The hope (or the commitment I should say) was that our next project would take place in Africa...but so much needed to happen to get there. Ah, but we will save that for next time...

What makes a great educator? Pt.2

In my last article, I started sharing stories with you about my best teachers, and why my experience with them was so amazing. My intention is to help you recognize what you need in an educator, so you can choose education that really supports your goals and propels you towards them.

To recap, here’s what I expressed I need from my educators so far:
-Patience/meeting me where I’m at.
-Break it down for me, one time
-Don’t let me get away with shit

And to continue…

Never give me the answer
I cannot express how imperative it is for an educator/mentor to withhold the answers to some questions. There is a teaching philosophy – The Art of Mentoring – that talks about answering questions with another question, forcing student to rely on themselves for answers. If you think about it, it’s brilliant. The student needs to trust their own intuition; What would you do if there was no master or teacher to ask? When I was learning to become a coach I worked with many seasoned trainers. The very first trainer I worked was Micky McQuaid. She reminded me of a catholic school nun who happened to be a die hard sports fan and could give a shit less if she offended you. She was intimidating to say the least. She had the job of transforming people’s lives through the trainings we facilitated, and as far as she was concerned, it not was not about us (the assisting coaches). She would give you an instruction one time, and she would make it very clear. If you dared to ask her for clarification, especially for something you could probably figure out on your own, she would scowl her face at you and ask back snidely “what did I say?” or “what do you think?” or “how do you think you would handle it?”. It was nerve racking, but we soon learned to internalize the question and figure it out for ourselves. Over time, if I didn’t take her demeanor personally, I became used to trusting myself more and more, having confidence in my coaching and my job. Micky wasn't actually being a bitch, (I freaking LOVE her) she just cared enough to know we were capable of finding answers on our own. Though she drove me crazy and scared the shit out of me, I was ultimately so grateful she did.

Acknowledge the gifts no matter how great or small

One of the side effects of being someone who tried really hard in school, but often came up short in results, is that you long for someone to tell you something you did right. The more seeming failure, the more feelings of dejection, the less confidence you have, and the less you trust yourself. I had another trainer once tell me that when she was being coached she would request that no matter how bad she was fucking up, just tell her one thing she was doing right and everything would be fine. I realized that was something I needed. So I started requesting that of all my mentors and coaches…I even requested that of my husband Charlie. Charlie is very analytical, methodical, and is very grounded where I am a passionate, creative, visionary and impulsive. Often times complex linear thinking type stuff eludes me, or take me longer to process than other things. Like doing the books, or creating systems in my business, or putting together electronics. Charlie will push me to try to do these things rather than always doing it for me. It often starts out as an epic fail. But bless my husband, he will always acknowledge even the tiniest thing. Sometimes all he’s got to go with is the fact I tried. Yeah it gets that bad. But his acknowledgement makes me feel more inclined to try again, and I do not feel as stupid for essentially making a disaster out of it. It makes a huge difference…and I always carry that into my style of teaching.

Respect as equals.

Finally, one of the things I cherish as a student and educator and make sure it surrounds me at all times is respect. There is nothing more off putting and just energetically twisted than an educator who acts as though they are superior to the student in anyway. As human beings, no matter how much experience we have, or do not have, we are important valuable contributions to our lives, and our potential is endless. To think those who have more education and knowledge (or money, or fame, or “attractiveness”) are at a level above others, is doing a disservice not only to the student, but to themselves. It’s small. The educator who thinks they have capped all that they can learn about their trade is quite honestly the dunce compared to their own student. The world constantly changes, and nothing stays the same. Thirteen years ago online marketing and social media was a commodity, not something essential. 3-D printing is now the new way to sculpt, digital photography has a whole new set of advantages, and new advantages in health and wellness has us be able to live longer. To not respect our students is chopping off our own legs at the knee. Of course respecting your mentors and those who come before you is also essential to the richest education, but it doesn't mean you give up your own self worth to do so. When I first started participating in a Native American Community for my spiritual guidance, there were so many traditions to learn and so many teachings to absorb. The elders of my community though steadfast in upholding tradition and respecting the teachings, always made me feel welcome, and respected my learning journey. As the world changes, the elders look to the youth to bring in new ideas and are always open to integrate the old with the new… And these traditions go back more than a century.

Overall the way I see it you always are at choice. You can choose to learn from people because they are popular, they have many followers, or you want to be able to say you were taught by them. You can choose to learn from someone because they make it easier for you, or because it seems they are successful. But if you check in with yourself authentically, will these attributes get you the furthest… Not just in your career, but who you are as a person. Will this person and experience develop you, challenge you, and push you to where you were meant to be. How will you know who they are? Do you research, ask questions, find referrals, listen to their style and voice…both online and in person. We didn't get the chance to choose who taught us as children, but we do now. So make educated choices, and informed decisions. Be a demand for great education, not just good.